வாழ்க வையகம் வாழ்க வளமுடன்

வாழ்க வையகம் வாழ்க வளமுடன்
வாழ்க வையகம் வாழ்க வளமுடன்

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Dare to come to stage?

Can any one of you come here?
Action: Wait for one person to come to stage. A person comes. Give chocolate to that person and say I really appreciate you for coming forward and ask that person to go and sit in his place. Now turn to the audience and start the speech
Mr.Toastmaster, fellow toastmasters and welcomed guests.
I wanted to ask to one question to all of you. When I asked Can any one of you come here? why only one person came at first? What stopped others to come forward?
Yes! If I were an audient i would not have come to the stage when somebody calls like this.
When I did introspection, I realized that I am not confident enough to come to stage and stand in front of others. It does not mean that I didn’t have confidence at all from the day I born. I strongly feel that self-confidence is one of the important aspects for a successful person.
we are all born with an innate sense of self-confidence. Every single child under the age of five that I have ever observed has had a strong self-confidence in at least one area of their life. It seems to me that we systematically lost that confidence and it is replaced by an inner critic. So, how do we rebuild that sense of self-confidence? I wanted to share some of parameters which really increased my confidence.
Here it goes.
 Face the fear: The more you face your fears the easy it will be for you to build your self confidence. So do which fears you more, like am doing this project.
 Find someone who is already confident in that area and copy them. Model as many of their behaviors for the context you want to be confident. Am trying to copy good public speakers in our club itself and also there are sitting here ( ex: swetha and eval name) .
 Don’t care or think too much about what everyone thinks and Let others to Judge/evaluate you like he/she is evaluating me.
 Have strong Values and beliefs and write your goals. Having goals and working towards that will increase your confidence. One of the best ways to build self confidence is to make goals and accomplish them. These could be small easily accomplished goals. What are something’s you have been putting off and need to do? Clean the room, return library books or say completing project 3 in this May month, Do something you’ve been procrastinating on. It doesn’t have to be big things. If you are able to complete small things that itself will boost you.
 Think positive and Kill negative thoughts – I have to think and believe that I can do this project well. That will increase my confidence. Say that I am intelligent and capable, I deserve to successful, I have the power to change myself and learn to love & accept you. You are unique.

 Get prepared for situation - It’s hard to be confident in yourself if you don’t think you’ll do well at something. Beat that feeling by preparing yourself as much as possible. Think about me taking this project, For today’s speech, I am prepared, so my confidence level is more. There is a saying “One important key to success is self confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation.” -Arthur Ashe”
 Empower yourself with knowledge. Empowering yourself, in general, is one of the best strategies for building self-confidence.
 Don’t seek perfection. Remember that the perfect is the enemy of the good. This is a huge problem in our life. Do you know anyone who has ever been perfect? Me neither. Do your best and let go.
 Identify your successes. Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself credit for your successes. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends!
 Redefine failure. Richard Bach - the author of Jonathan Livingston Seagull was turned down by 18 publishers before, finally in 1970, MacMillan published it. By 1975, this book had sold more than 7 million copies in the U.S.
 Embrace Risk and dare yourself - I don't mean walk a tight-rope without a net . I mean stop being afraid to live! Allow yourself to experience new things, feel your feelings , let yourself be imperfect, make mistakes, fail, and be okay with all of it! Because you are perfect just as you are, and life is too short to live it to the fullest!
 Exercise and eat healthy. Use Guided Meditation. Exercise raises endorphins and makes one feel happier and healthier. It is certainly an easy and effective way to boost your self-confidence. Dress nicely and groom nicely that will increase your confidence. I did it today. Am I looking confident? 
 Compare yourself to yourself. Not to others. Be yourself. Comparing myself to others is Counter-productive. It only makes me feel inadequate. What’s important is simply producing the best work I can. All I can be is myself. I always surprised! Wow! How greatly each individual is designed. I really should not compare my speech with Swetha’s speech.
Finally one important parameter:
 Be thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.

Do you think all these parameter will increase your confidence?
Remember a bodybuilding does not get that body by lifting weights just once, it takes a long time to build that much muscle. The same principle goes into for us to increase our self confidence. Dr. David Schwartz, a professor at Georgia State University says Nobody will believe in you until you believe in yourself.
Don’t wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.
Dear friends, now tell me, do you think that you can increase your confidence?
Can any one of you come to stage now? Sorry I don’t have many chocolates 


This is my TM Speech 4